What I’ve been up to..

So a new obsession has temporarily taken over my life…

But before you all freak out don’t worry – it’s for the best (at least I hope). Remember a while back I told you all about my Zumba course. Well naturally it was the funnest weekend of my life –  I mean 2 days of dancing with great music and awesome people – practically like a 16 hour party 😉 Then I went to Czech on holiday, came back and threw myself heart and soul into preparing for my first class.

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To be honest – this all came at a good time. Anyone who ever battled an ED can tell you that when you lost that “identity” you have a hard time finding yourself again. Dance was always a part of me, and although for the longest of times I wasn’t well enough to do it, it was something I’ve always loved. I also enjoy fitness, moving, getting sweaty and tired. Zumba does that for me- and more. Being an instructor gives me an identity to tap into- it provides me contact with people I might otherwise not reach out to, it introduces me to another, very positive community. It makes me feel happier, more fulfilled. It gives me something to work towards – another goal in my future.

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Dyploma time 🙂

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There are however, a few bumps in this journey (unfortunatly last I checked I still live in the real world). I live in a small town, and there is only one other instructor here – who isn’t too thrilled to have me around :(. She also has a very solid fan base, and I have a hard time imagining trying to find my niche in the market. Sometimes I feel overwhelmed – wondering if I’m good enough, have enough charisma, if I can even still dance. Somedays it all feels like a waste of time and money.

My body image is also constantly changing . Dancing in front of a mirror for an hour a day minimum isn’t the easiest for someone used to picking themselves apart. Add that to the fact my apetite and weight are all over the place recently (lots of cardio makes you HUNGRY – and I’m at a stage if I’m hungry – I eat, junk food or not), and you have a pretty troubling duo. I’m still on top of it,but lets face it, some days I just don’t feel like the dance diva I should.

Food is no longer the focus of my life in any way, however I need to focus on taking care of myself better. There are quite a few bad habits I have picked up along the way, which need to be corrected if I want to keep working at 100%. But today started with an avocado pudding (part of that focus is more healthy fats), and I’m hoping it’ll only go up from here.

 

I know seems scary, but it tates SOOOO good, and so far my insanely sensitive stomach isn’t objecting – so win win 😉

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4 comments

  1. This is so exciting!
    I can’t believe this all happened so fast – last time,it was basically just an idea in your head and now,you have a dilpoma?!
    I am thrilled to hear more about your experiences as a Zumba instructor soon,and I wish I lived closer so I could join one of your classes!
    I’m so proud of you,Liz,your journey is so inspiring for me and so many others out there. 🙂

    • Awww, thanks Kat, this made me smile. And I really do hope I have some experiences to write about soon :P. Kind of going through a low right now, so I really appreciate you taking the time to pop by 🙂

  2. Beautiful Leelou! I’m so proud of you girl! For following your passions and going through with your dreams. For not letting anorexia tell you what you should and shouldn’t like doing. For taking care of yourself ❤
    Like Kat, I wish I could join your classes too!
    I understand about the body image, though. And it is especially difficult when you are balancing between a healthy amount of exercise in addition to the increase that you need in order to have enough energy to keep dancing. But I think that this challenge will have positive outcomes. By having dance as a healthy outlet, you will be even more in tune with your body's signals. Then if and when you feel slip-ups, you can remind yourself that you need the energy to keep dancing. ❤
    Thinking of you dearest.


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