It can’t be all sunshine and rainbows …..
I was silly, I stepped on the scale the other day.
The number was up, like way up. Makes me feel like shit 😦
My brain tells me the there are numerous reasons for that – water retention, weight fluctuation, time of the months etc. But my feelings are not being very cooperative.
I feel angry – because I like to eat damn it. I don’t want to worry about the scale going up. Yet I feel my pants getting tighter, my clothes fitting worse. Am so incredibly swamped in setetary work I don’t have time to exercise. All I have time to do is sit, with my book in hand and eat, and try to force my mind to focus without constantly chewing. ARGH. And I’m bloated and feeling like crap to boot.
Why oh why is eating so complicated? All my school mates eat like crap 6-7 days a week and are slim as can be. And me – I eat what I like, when I like, but it doesn’t seem like obscene amounts to me. I don’t want to count calories and plan meals and all that BS. But then again, the alternative of my clothes fitting tighter is worse.
Last thing I need now to add to my stress. I need to get it out so I’m writing it here. Hopefully tomorrow will be better – it has to be 😦